'RAIN DOWN, RAIN DOWN ON ME...FROM A GREAT HEIGHT, FROM A GREAT HEIGHT'


Okay, this isn't nice.

Last night, after James and I successfully defused a potentially fatal boil-over between Darren and Louis, we decided to go downstairs to the bar with Darren and have a few drinks to cool things off. (To be honest, a drink was the last thing Darren needed, but it was neccessary to separate the both of them.)

After about two hours drinking and chatting, I paid my rent at the bar and we exited via the side door onto the street. Just a brief couple of paces to the left is the door that leads upstairs to the hostel. The three of us were about to go inside when I heard a 'spattering' noise on the pavement just behind me. "Ah," I thought. "Somebody in the hostel lounge is squirting water at us! Playing silly buggers." Some of it wet the side of my face. "Right, let's see who it is!" Much to our surprise, the stream was not coming from our second floor lodgings, but from the third level. The third level!
And this was not water. Not beer. Not wine, no! Was it apple juice? Ah shit, it's piss...

Behold - framed by the window - a completely naked slap-headed monkey-brained fuck-knuckle using the street where we were standing as his ensuite. Nice one, buddy. We proceeded (well I know I did) to hurl abuse at the offender, but he ignored us and stoically continued doing his business for a good minute more. Freak!!!
Once done, he closed window, turned light off and went to bed again. Dodging the flood, we went upstairs. Darren went another flight up and proceeded to abuse the urinator's hapless girlfriend. (The Urinator himself never came out of his room - letting his woman take the shit. Nice one.) What a guy.